Some things are just too scary to let your mind even go there. I’m not talking about BIG scary things, like tragedy level or anything, but rather all the rest. You know you have these fears because when you’re confronted with a tiny glimpse of one of them, the panic sets in, and you realize there is so much you take for granted that can go so terribly wrong.
Thanks Amanda for the Thinking Out Loud link-up! And now to embark on some of my worst fears along with, well, not sure what else yet. This is TOL after all.
Big Fear #1
My phone falling in the toilet.
I know, you just choked on your breakfast at the thought of this really happening. Extra points if it’s a public toilet, extra extra points if it’s a port-o-potty, like at a race. I think about this before every race when I use the bathroom, but it hits me in my own home too. Just so bad if that were to really happen.
Big Fear #2
My blog disappearing.
There were a couple of times when my site went down inexplicably. While Bluehost was oh so nice and patient in fixing it, and I do “trust” them (as much as I can trust anything tech related which I don’t understand) the thought of all this work disappearing freaks the hell out of me.
Big Fear #3
Anything breaking that will cost more than $500 to replace.
Extra scary if it will cost more than $2,000, extra extra scary if it’s my car. So scary, I’m shivering.
Big Fear #4
Being scammed by service men.
To my knowledge I have caught every service man who has attempted to scam me, and it has been many. The key thing to look for is the scare tactic they usually use, like “you have a fire hazard, now pay me $1500 to fix it.” They are really scum if they throw your first name in there as in “I’m not okay with leaving you and your sweet children here with this fire hazard Michele. It will be 1,500 to fix it.”
Anyway I can go a bit overboard in the paranoia department with these guys because of this fear, like I did recently with the poor guy who came to fix my oven when the power was flickering. Turns out he was not scamming me and fixed my oven at a reasonable price. I will now be forever indebted to him and bake him Paleo muffins in my now perfectly functional oven. Still, I have this fear.
Big Fear #5
Being sprayed by a skunk while out running.
I have always been afraid of skunks after reading a book as a child about someone getting sprayed by a skunk. I actually saw a skunk outside while running Monday morning and froze dead in my tracks – very unlike me in the middle of a run. It was trying to go back underground or wherever it came from and the snow was blocking its entrance. After stopping, my adrenaline kicked in and I hauled ass so fast up the hill I was on I nearly puked. That’s a stupid (and big) fear right there.
Speaking of winter running, I realized something during the 5th minute of getting my layers on this morning.
I realized that it only takes 5 minutes to drive to the gym. Which means that if I had just put on one layer I could have been already at the gym parking my car. One of my thoughts on running outdoors is that I’m saving time by not driving to the gym, but the time spent layering up negates that whole thing. Especially when the windchill was zero, like this morning. Two pairs of socks, two shirts, a jacket, a neckwarmer, gloves plus mittens, a hat, the headlamp. Yeah, not saving any time there, so I might rethink the days that running outside requires this much layering.
It is pretty though! At least after my run when it’s getting light out.
Something else I’ve been thinking about since my race on Sunday, is motivation versus good old stubbornness. I think most runners have noticed that the two have sort of a strange and intertwined relationship. What I’ve found, is that some of my motivation to run is always out of stubbornness to avoid “giving up” whatever that really means.
Well, here’s some of what it means.
I find that when I face a challenge that could potentially interfere with my running, like a snowstorm, sick child, super cold weather, or scheduling issues, I wind up feeling motivated to run more than on any average day when there’s no challenge. If I feel I won’t be in control and will be forced to rest, like that icy morning last week, I fight harder to be able to run. Yes, I’m more motivated and it’s actually a good feeling, but it’s also part of being rigid and stubborn and not wanting to accept defeat. Raise your hand (or comment) if you can relate to any of this!
I would bet that many consistent runners have this trait, and if you have it but don’t run, you might want to consider running!
Now you’re turn to think out loud!
What’s one of your biggest fears?
Motivated, stubborn, or both?
Do you feel extra motivated when challenged?
Yes yes yes! Extra motivated when challenged. I actually seem to thrive in chaos. I relate to that! And I laughed out loud about the phone falling fear. I’ve worried about that too. A lot. My first MacBook Pro was baptized with my daughter’s spilled glass of milk. I had it for 4 months, no warranty, and the milk spilled right into the motherboard. MOST TRAUMA EVER. The Best Buy guy actually put his arm around me while I cried and said, “your children are healthy; you get to take them home” as he tried to give me some perspective. Gah.
That is definitely one of those times when crying (and screaming) over spilled milk makes sense! Perspective can be hard!
I also share your fear of dropping my phone down the toilet. I also have a fear of dropping my wedding rings down the toilet or the sink. I never thought about the skunk thing before! I’ve never seen one out on a run but that would be awful.
I still think it takes me more time for me to drive to the gym and get set up to run indoors than it would take to put on 5 layers and run outside. Even though its only a 5-10 minute drive once i get there I need to take off whatever layers I had put on (usually sweats, a long sleeve, and a jacket) and get warmed up enough to start running
Also, I have been thinking alot about the stubbornness thing and was hoping to write a post about it tomorrow…but we’ll see if I get to it! This week has been crazy!
Wedding ring in the sink or shower drain is a fear and I always make sure I take mine off! Good point about taking OFF the layers at the gym. Winter is just a huge production where running is concerned. Looking forward to reading that post, I have many thoughts on my own issues!
I do have a fear over making sure my house is locked when I leave it. I lock, then check the handle a few times just to make sure! Don’t know where this came from but I guess it means I am always extra safe!
My husband does the same with locks. He checks everything a few times before bed and also randomly! That’s one thing I don’t think about as much so good for him to worry 🙂
Random paranoias: getting locked out of my house, slipping on ice (and falling in general), and “getting in trouble.” For the most part, I have reasoning for each of these, but you would think that I could get over the whole getting in trouble bit.
Haha I can relate to the “getting in trouble” one! I think I’m very sensitive to rules and always afraid I’m breaking some rule. I’m sure elementary school brainwashed me at my weakest!
My biggest fear is a rattlesnake being in the toilet and biting me. Rattlesnakes in general scare the crap out of me. Had one in my garage once and never got over it. I can completely relate to the website one. I’m always holding me breath when I update a plugin.
That is horrifying! I’m sure if we had those around that would be up there with my fears. Updating plugins will always be a little scary I think 😉
The phone falling into the toilet fear is a real thing. It doesn’t happen so much to me at home, but it’s definitely something I’m super careful with when I’m using a public washroom. And for losing your blog… do you back it up regularly? Because there are plugins you can download that will back up your blog so that you can save everything you have up to that point. I know that Bluehost is pretty good about backing it up on a daily basis, though, so you don’t have toooo much to worry about.
I should get a plugin, I know bluehost is backing it up but I don’t do anything in addition to that mainly because I’m a tech idiot. Thanks for the info 🙂
)))skunk smell((( I swear I didn’t even know what skunks smelled like when I lived on Long Island.
Agreed! I think PA was the first time I noticed!
Totally! I will not let anything get in the way of my run. I’m always extra “motivated” since I only have one a week! So it HAS to happen!
I hear you on that, because especially when I’m training for a marathon I am that way with the long run. It MUST happen. Although I’ve been known to make it happen even when I was sick or otherwise, so not always the smartest thing. Good and bad side to this trait!
Yes! I do feel extra motivated when challenged. I had hip surgery in July and I have been so challenged in doing the exercises that I want to do but it just motivates me more!
I have a fear of strangers at my door! I will not answer the door if I’m home by myself or with the kids during the day! You never know!
I’m a bit like that with answering the door too! The day it snowed my husband left for work but came back like 20 minutes later because the buses weren’t running, and I almost didn’t answer the door! Hope your hip is healing well 🙂
Your phone fear is a REAL fear of mine. I once dropped my phone, in the porta, at the start of Boston. What was worse is that it was my first year running for a children’s hospital and I knew my patient partners mom was waiting for my texts along the way. I have never lived this moment down. At At one point, I actually considered reaching my hand into the porta potty to retrieve it. I didn’t, don’t worry. I AM a lady. Lol.
I am always afraid of getting scammed/assaulted by delivery&repairmen! I refuse to let ANYONE in the house if Greg isn’t home. . . So much so that I make sure he is going to be home before scheduling anything to be delivered, I’m nuts.
Oh my! I’m feeling super anxious just reading about your story! That would just be so horrible in so many ways, especially being that you had to run a marathon after that! Ahh! I’m weird about opening doors too, but I will suck it up and let delivery men in if I have to!
First, I am SO like that when it comes to things interfering with my running/working out- I am SO much more motivated if there is a possibility of something standing in my way! I have weird fears as well- like if my kids have to go to the bathroom when we are driving through a bad part of town. Or if the little one is sleeping and the 6 y/o has to go. I think I just have issues with public bathrooms in general!!
So funny that you can relate! Must be a mom-runner thing especially to be motivated that way! And all the public bathroom stuff I can relate to as well, especially thinking back to when any of them were barely potty trained.
I dropped my phone in the toilet at home once. It was in my back pocket and fell out. Needless to say, that was when I upgraded to the newest (at that time) iPhone. Now I’m super paranoid about dropping my phone or wedding rings in the toilet/shower drain/sink.
I’m also randomly super afraid of leaving burners on, I have to check them like ten times before leaving the house or going to sleep.
I keep my phone away from pockets for that reason! Having my car key almost fall in a porto-potty because it flew out of my pocket taught me that one. I think about the burner thing sometimes while driving, but haven’t fixated on it too badly. It’s always a good thing to check though.
Snakes. I’m freaking terrified of snakes. Even if they are behind glass at a zoo or aquarium, I avoid them. I picture Harry Potter when the glass just disappeared and the snake would get out and eat me. It’s ridiculous and totally irrational but omg I wish all snakes would die. That’s my number 1 reason for wanting to move to Hawaii. They have no snakes.
Haha! We don’t have snakes around here to my knowledge, and generally they don’t bother me if I see them at a zoo or kids party or something. Your snake thing sounds like a flat out phobia. Everyone has something!
I don’t know when I will run outside again. The snow mounds are so high and it’s icy. Ugh!
The snow mounds themselves don’t bother me as much as single digit temps do! The next week doesn’t look so good.
Bahah! I had to laugh at your comment about the skunk… I have encountered a few on early morning runs and my reaction was the opposite of yours… I don’t think I’ve ever run so fast! Lol!
I definitely sprinted like all hell once I was knocked out of my stupor! So scary!
One of my reasons for not running with music is so I can hear something approaching…mainly critters. Some of the paths I run are out in the valley where these wild animals roam and I’m scared of encountering one during a run!
Wild animals completely freak me out as well, although all I really see here are little critters, deer, and turkeys oddly. The turkeys actually can be really scary in the warmer weather!
Leaving a burning candle or the stove on when leaving the house is one of my very random fears. So much so I won’t light candles in the morning anymore – half-asleep doesn’t make for the most cautious mind – and check the stove multiple times. I swear I inherited that from my dad.
Fire in general is a fear for me! I don’t light candles at all really because of my kids. I was always a little nervous having them around honestly! And I’ll sometimes wonder if I left a burner on while driving. Oh the anxiety!
Same fear with the skunk! I have also have dropped my car key in a port potty…No more pockets in running shorts without a zipper! Cost me $500 and had to call for a ride home.
Oh man, that is horrifying! I am really really careful about what’s in my pockets now. My key was zipped away for my last race!
Have you ever watched the movie Urban Legends? Ever since I watched it, I’m terrified of some serial killer hiding in my backseat waiting to kill me.
Ahh! That’s freaky. I’m pretty much never in my car alone except in broad daylight, but I can really see that being creepy if you’re alone in your car at night!
I have this irrational fear of being stuck in a car that’s sinking in water. I have no clue why!
Ahh! That’s a scary one too. Reminds me of the movie Beetlejuice which I watched over and over as a kid!
Fears numbers 2-4 I can DEFINITELY relate to. It’s also why I’m afraid to switch to self-hosting my blog…I don’t want to lose everything nor do I want to not have my older blogging stuff work and transfer with my new blog website! #bloggerproblems. And as far as the servicemen go, you just gotta act like you’re a pro I suppose. Luckily, my fiance is a car enthusiast and knows lots about them. Including how to repair them or diagnose the problem. So I have hopes for that in our future if we have car problems! But a plumber, electrician, etc….not so much.
I always play it “cool” with the service men but how “cool” can a suburban housewife like myself really play it with things like that? You are lucky that your fiance understands cars though, that is a GOOD thing to know about!
I would be scared of skunks too, ew! So happy we don’t have them in New Zealand! I am scared of spiders and I also get this weird fear that people will think that’s funny and try to throw one at me :s
The things we think of with fears! Spiders aren’t terrible for me but other huge bugs are BAD. Summer is a little scary for me!
Lately one of my biggest fears has been having my identity taken. I mean everything from my social security number to all my money. It’s scary that people are doing this to so many. Knock on wood…but my bank account hasn’t been hacked. I am also scared of my house flooding again. Never want to go through that again. It was horrible…worst six months of my life!
That is one I haven’t thought about but a real fear since I’ve heard of it happening. And flooding, wow, so sorry you went through that! It’s these crazy things we can’t control that are just the worst. Glad that’s over with for you!
I’m scared of spiders. Like crazy scared and een more so, silver fish. Google those crazy things and you’ll understand why.
Oh gosh I’ll have to do that!